Cobras do it! why not Speedsters?

Speaking of Chickens, did you hear about that guy and the chimpanzees? What a tragady! That is one "monkey" that did not get spanked!

Ricardo, most things would be ok, and that house by the lake, with miss rocket nipples coming out of the water every morning,mmmmmmmmm! but the small mindedness of 'some' of the people in a small community, everyone knowing your business, I could do without. Oh yeh and having to travel for miles to get to your nearest Tesco (Stop & Shop, Wallmart, whatever)

Where did the chimp come into this, I think I missed something?

That monkey should be more than spanked or shocked. Did I hear correctly that they bit off one of the guy's feet?!

now even more confused?

Patrick
foot, nose and testicles is what I heard. Kind of makes you look at J Fred Muggs in a different light. Appoligies to those under 50.
ed

Ed, what every morning news program needs, J Fred Muggs provided an answer. Guess that makes me over fifty.
John as in Hoss
professional geezer

Thank the stars that Cheetah never did that to Boy! Jane would have been pissed that he wouldnt be able to swing on the vines.

Maybe you have to be American to understand about the monkey.
I'm British, so can someone explain to my stupid arse (that's ass to you lot)how we got from chicken to monkey?

mick,
J Fred Muggs was a chimp that was on the Today Show a long time ago along with Dave Garraway, Jack Lescoolie, Hugh Downs and some guy named Frank who read the news and usually bollixed it up. They dressed up J Fred in a coat and tie and he sat around being cute among other duties. People outside the studio lined up and pressed their noses against the glass windows the whole time the show was on. Excuse me now, I've go to g listen to my les paul and mary ford 78s.
ed

Hey, Ed and all,

I think Mick needs to hear about the monster Chimp attack on the guy, I only got a few bits of it myself. It kinda disappeared from the radar screen real fast so don't know if it was a legit story or not. I certainly hope not. Maybe somebody can expand on the story.

Bruce

Yes, please tell me about the f***i** chimp a what it's got to do with a chicken?

Bruce, A husband and wife go to a wild animal preserve to visit a chimp they raised and had to get rid of...while there 2 male chimps escape their enclosure and attack the couple, the man tries to protect the wife and in the process loses an eye among other things,
cause the chimps went ballistic. He is still in intensive care last I heard...The 2 male chimps were killed....
I sure hope this is the story you were talking about..If not
Never Mind....
Lesson...Never trust an animal....of any kind, even a chicken...

Vince,

I think that is the story and almost sorry I asked! Guess the thread has been diluted some, eh?

Bruce

Hey Mick this isn't dry American humor, it was a newspaper article about these people who were having a birthday party for a chimp they used to own, when one of the chimps attacked the couple, he focused on the guy and bit off his fingers, blinded one eye, and took a bite out of his butt. The guy was/is in very bad shape. One of the statements in the article was that a four foot tall chimp has ten times the upper torso strength of a six foot human. Evidently chimps get a little grouchy as they age.

Hmmm I could be that way - sometimes.

Hey; I have a chicken story that I swear is true. This really happened to me as a child of five or six. I used to spend my summers at my Uncles little ffarm in the foothills out side of a little town of Fiddletown. To make my story short, one day I thought I would help out and go gather eggs from the chicken coop. I didn't realize at the time but my uncle used to breed game cocks. Well I was in the prcess of trying gathe eggs and I wassn't having any luck. I couldn't find any eggs,but,, I sure pissed off the chickens they started going besirk and I was try to get away from them pecking and jumping up in my face. They scared the shit out of me, I was running as fast as I could toget away from them right on my heels I jumped the high fence , I didn't want to slow down to open the gate. My uncles was in histrerics and he kept telling this story to everyone that I cleared that high fence with a sinle bound. Chickens that don't lay eggs can be very scary. To this day, I enjoy eating chicken, maybe I figgure paybacks are in order

The chimps bit of ALL the mans fingers, tore out one eye, ripped the lips and part of a cheek, chewed of one foot and ... ripped of the mans testicals. I guess the chicken is involved because both the chicken and the man still has his

Ok, now that's sorted I think I will go and watch Doc Hollywood again!

Dale,

I didn't want to go into that much detail.

"Nothing but the facts, mam" (sir) How is that chicken by the way?

I ate it tonight with fries!

"Fries"? You mean "Chips", right? Unless your using US lingo then the "Chips" would be "Crisps". "Crisps" however are never "Fries".

Isn't nice that "Speedster" means "Fun" in any country.
-=theron

Didn't think you Americans would understand that in the UK fries are chips and chips are crisps. Maybe you lot have more upstairs than we give you credit for:-)
Oh dear, just waiting for the backlash!!

Thanks to all that have taken part in this discusion, I think it has now run it's course, the chichen has been laid to rest, goodness knows what has happened to the monkey, Julie Warners nipples are fantastic and so is just about every Speedster on this site:-)Good night!!

I don't see what the problem is with pan based cars. I just purchased a vintage speedster, with only a 1600cc engine and I love it. I am not looking for a top notch sports car, just something that will give me a throw back to the 50's. It gets the job done plain and simple.

No problem if that is what you want, my original post says that other replicas out perform the originals, why not Speedsters?
If you are happy with what you have, that's good but I want a classic Speedster shape, with high tech suspension and an ultra ridgid chassis for track days and country roads. A while back, I went for a test ride, I say ride as I was in the passenger seat of a top brand UK Speedster replica, I was driven through narrow twisty roads, the car rattled, squeeked and had major skuttle shake. Maybe in America your roads a smoother and straighter, I know you don't have many roundabouts, so maybe you can be happy with something that is not as ridgid, I want what I have described but no one makes it, so I'm having to make the chassis and suspension myself. The more ridgid the better, I think every wife would agree, you get better performance from a ridgid structure!!

I would rather discuss Julie Warner's nipples!!!!

Mike:

Have you ever ridden in real 1957 Speedster? I think what you are hankering for is a Navigator or a Mercedes brand sportscar. I don't think a Speedster body can conceal all the modern day suspension components that make new sportscars feel like pillows.

(P.S. In high school I knew a fellow whose father bought him a COBRA. The kid instantly became popular. One time while I was admiring his car he told me that during the summer he had to wrap the pedals in towels because they got so hot he couldn't touch them with his bare feet).

Bill, no I do not want comfort, I want a true seat of the pants sports car. There is more than enough room for the suspension, because I do not have to work within the constrains of a Beetle floor pan or the huge torsion bar suspension front and back. Double A arm can be desingned to take up very little room and used in conjuntion with pushrods to actuate the coil overs, they can be put almost anywhere, this is adjustable rising rate suspension giving a spring rating of 325 to 450 lbs up front and 350 to 475lbs at the back, I don't think pillows would best describe the ride.
Who cares about that guys feet, I am putting the engine where it should be on My Speedster, hanging out the back so not problems with hot tootsies for me, the Cobra thing was just an analogy!
Now please stop telling me what I want, this is my car and this is what I want, not a Merc or a Navigator(whatever that is) or a Cobra. I have not slagged other peoples cars off, they have built what they want to build, loads have updated to IRS rear suspension in order to make them handle better, Jogyver has done a fantastic job remanufacturing his chassis to make it handle better, some are mid engined, totally going away from the Speedster concept, again to make them handle better and in this case very much like a modern sports car, you yourself are having one built on a custom tube chassis! All are mighty fine cars and built because that person wants that car, the Speedster shape with better handling, whats wrong with me going a step further and making a custom semi monocque with race car suspension.
I would now rather talk about Julie Warners nipples too.

Would one of the sypder tube frames get closer? Or do they use similar components at the front and rear?

Patric, I'm not sure that I fully understand your question and I don't know much about Spyders but in the UK a company Martin & Walker make a Spyder with a custom tube chassis (don't know much about the style of the chassis) using beetle 1303 components, The engine and gearbox are turned 180 degrees to make it mid engined and the dif is turned upside down to have the gears driving the correct way. I believe they use the rear semi trailing arms converted to coil overs and at the front replace the strut with a top rocker arm. I could be wrong but don't Beck do something similar? So another Porsche replica that out handles the original!

Mick,

That sounds about right.

Patrick, I checked the Martin & Walker website and just to put things right, the M & W Spyder uses a large diamater twin tube chassis which is braced with triangulation and sheet steel in many areas, the front suspension is as I described but the back uses a De Deon tube with four trailing arms and is located lateraly with a panhard rod. They have also fitted a flat six to one in the photos, that should run rings round a modern Boxter!