No Californians here, Bucko.
Anybody feel like those clowns out there in Cali have lost touch with their inner weathermen? Like maybe their talk of sun and surf, great cruises and amorous women have just been consistent reminders that our weather sucks?
I say we let them know how life is in the real world with a thread of our own. Bring out the Canadians. Let's hear from the New Yorkers. Mickey, mash some buttons and stick up a picture of your ice-fallen, broken a** and your car with studded tires on it.
Where are the Englishmen in all of this chatting about the sun? I bet those poor sods haven't seen it since July of 2006!
Where's poor Dusty? We haven't heard from him since he had to tunnel his way to the outhouse with a garden trowel! How is Jim Ward? He's probably in a solid block of ice by now!
Anybody from Vermont, or maybe New Hampshire? Nova Scotia? Groenland? Tellar thu Danske? Where's Oregon in all this? Mountain biking somewhere in the Cascades in a snomobile suit and full-face helmet?
Where are the Siberians? The "Great Alaskan In Hiding" from Chicago, with his sled-dog-pulled, copper-colored, carbon-fiber-lined, Iditer-hotrod contender?
We need to pull together here folks. Get out your scarves. Pull on the mittens. Don the PARKAS! CRY HAVOC!
(Phew. That was fun. Personally, I gave in to the pressures of reality today. Baltimore had a high of 35 and a low of 27. My car's not working. The Chesapeake Bay is cold and gray, and even the geese have all gone farther south. Is it spring yet?)
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