I saw something on Lambros' picture page ...

... and I had to do something funny.

I know we all have the little cars, the books and the other trinkets that go with the namesake marquee. Unlike most, however, I got REALLY lucky.
I have an actual historical, archaeological find adjacent to the house dating back to the dawn of the Speedsterus era. I don't know how many of y'all knew this, but the Speedster was really a Roman design.
I think the god Speedius Rortus Exhaustus Noisus (a.k.a. Speedius Replicus Hoopticus) was worshipped at roadside shrines, not unlike the one Lambros has in his garage. Never mind actuarian history, this find reveals to me that the Roman conquest of the Franks, the Volkswagens and the Gauls did happen in Maryland.
I will publish the paper before the fall semester, once the research is borne out, but I believe the very driveway the car is sitting on must have been a Roman Autostradvs.

For now, though, just between us here on the SOC, allow me to prove it!

Cory
That is pretty cool.That is museum material!!!!
You know for the most part the Romans copied the Greeks,but your piece doesn't look like a Greek one.Now you can pray to this god (Speedius Replicus Hoopticusk).BTW I am Greek.
Hey did you get my e-mail last week?

I'm not sure. I looked in both the home and the work e-mails, and there wasn't anything in there with your name on it. ... Might have been zapped by the filter. What was the content?
And you're probably right. I'm sure the lines of the Hooptius resemble more the flowing lines of the original Greek paintings than the archetypical Roman mosaics. Those mosaics can get so pixelated over time. ...

Cory
That is soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo FUNNY.Love it.
check your e-mail.

Try these addresses:
cory.drake AT fmmc.army.mil -- or -- lindisfarne793 AT hotmail.com ... Nothing in either box as yet.

Cory
I tried sending you one from my rr and I couldn't get throu so I went to my yahoo and I believe I got it.I used the second one.

Hey Cory!

I believe you may have unwittingly discovered the missing link the the evolution of modern day Replica car industry.

The recent fictionalized story in the 'DaVince Code'
has stirred interest in biblical accuracy. However, a lesser known mystery is beginning to gain more attention. In ancient Greece, the mythical god of mindless power, Biggus Dickus, was a major influence in the formation of the modern day Replica car industry.

Many of the ancient Greeks idolized Biggus Dickus with sacrifical offerings of Cobra statuettes (the Greek symbol for awesome phallic power). It has long been said that imitation is the greatest form of flattery. In light of this, the frenzy to create more intricate and accessorized cobra statuettes to offer Biggus Dickus in tribual meetings weakened the fabric of Greek sensability, causing followers of Biggus Dickus to squander all their earnings in search of the most desirous Cobra statuette.

Meanwhile, a less vocal group, members of Speedicus Replicateous, also known for their superior intellect, developed a more dignified and subtle manner of adulation. Imitations of Speedster statuettes (Speedsters in those days were not vehicles as we know them today, but rather any small item of great design and value).

Through the centuries, remnant evidence of these diametrically opposed factions can still be found in all areas of the globe. And descendants of their ancient practice can still be seen in many modern day parking lots.

I believe, Cory, by recognizing the shrine in Lambros' picture, that you have uncovered one of these mythilogical artifacts.

Cool!!

From that rather baseless and yet tasteful hypothesis, we can then extract the following inane observation: there is a correlation between the required diameter of an exhaust outlet and the passage through which one must flow exhaust. If the exhaust comes from a squeeze, suck, bang, blow process (the two-stroke engine, naturally) there is a direct relation between the amount of expended fuel and the amount of exhaust. If that is so, then we must contend the number of cylinders required to generate the amount of desired exhaust -- assuming the operator of the equipment has designed it with maximum exhaust output in mind -- is driving the train toward how much fuel must be sucked in. Therefore, the more efficient the engine, the less exhaust emission; the less it emits, the smaller the pipe can be. The efficiency of a boxer, say, would require only a small-diameter exhaust while providing plenty of oomph. Larger, more inefficient pistons designed only to produce hot exhaust in large quantities must, therefore, only be intended to counter precision with volume -- assuming again that the operator had hot air as his intention from the outset.
In summary, big diesel trucks from Detroit (with the three-inch outlets) have GOT to be compensating for their lack of something.

Have I got that right, following the Greco-Roman model?

http://www.safetycenter.navy.mil/photo/images/images-0-50/photo36_3.jpg

Sorry, e'rybody. This kind of got out of control. I'm done ...

(Hate to admit it, but I glommed onto one of those three-inch Flowmaster setups for the Hoopty as soon as I saw it ... Not quite sure what the Greco-Roman model indicates there ...)

Great history class!!!!.I learn something new every day.
Guys that was very entertaining!!Good job.