Idiot lights identify an idiot

Yeah, so there I was, just minding my own business, when ...
Hokay, Soh ... .
Let's say you were at Carlisle this year and you saw the left red light on the dash of the Sloppy Jalopy blinking intermittently. Let's also say that the light didn't appear to indicate anything really wrong, but it was just annoying enough to tell you that everything with the car wasn't perfect. Peaches, cream ... and a little, very bothersome, half-inch red light beaming away on the dashboard. Once in a while.
So, let's assume also that you've never owned a Beetle before, either. You wired your dashboard the way you wanted it, and you cut your holes in a specific arrangement so you'd know what was what. You left enough real estate on the driver's side that you could add doodads and lights as the car developed, and you left enough on the right side of the tach to add gauges, same-same.
Now, imagine you were half of the build team.
So. ... Back to the problem at Carlisle. The answer to the red light on the left was -- as far as I could guess from the amount of oil-smoke on the rear cowl and the splatter around the dipstick -- oil. That's why you put an oil light on the dash in the first place. It's the business end of the "Hey dumbass, pull over now, 'cuz there's less than six pounds' pressure in your case," switch you installed in the engine. I put the light there myself, and I ran the wires. I KNOW what that light means.
Before the addition of the oil and generator lights, the dash looked like this -- telling you essentially nothing:

(more)

While the light occasionally came on in Carlisle, there wasn't any real worry. I've already posted some of those minor annoyances here, mostly griping about having to add half a quart every five minutes because of the little light coming on. The result of adding so many half-quarts was the none-too-funny expedited oil change and splatterfest in the Sheraton parking lot in Chambersburg (See 'Lindbergh crosses Atlantic,' on page A-16 of the same 'Old News' paper).
But the light went out after the oil change, and I assumed everything was hunky-dory.
Well, no.
We went to Wilmington last week (uh-huh; page A-17.) and the light was steadily shining in my face, right in front of me. That's why A) they call them idiot lights, and B) they're right in front of ME.
I'm assuming, since the oil on the dipstick looks like it's supposed to and it's clear and bright, that maybe it's heat. Maybe I fried the switch, or I have a ground problem. Both would seem reasonable to me. Remember, I never had a Bug, and I've never had any problems with this car that I couldn't diagnose or fix with a consult.
I started chasing wires, and I bought the remote cooler assembly to knock down the spiking temperatures. The problem was, everything is very well grounded. I've got problems with the ground on my fuel gauge and horn (same bolt for both) and a slight bit of trouble with my turn signal sockets needing replacement, but everything else works like factory.
So what the hell? How come I still have an idiot light for my oil pressure? Even after adding the new cooler and a total of 5.25 quarts, new lines and a Mobil 1 filter change, it's STILL on!
I knew it was something obvious; like I said, I friggin' wired them! The Wrench did the finish wiring and the majority of the connections to the fuse box, but I couldn't figure it our to save my life.
So I called him up. ...

(more)

... And he told me that I needed a 13mm socket to fix my problem.
Here's a replay of the conversation, for those who missed it:

Me: Dude. My oil light's still on, and the Hoopty's dead at a gas station. I have my tool bag, but I can't find the source of the problem. I might have overheated the car again, but this time it's at 210 degrees with a good oil level. The cooler's installed and working.
Wrench: What did you do to make it come on in the first place?
Me: Been running the old girl pretty hard lately. Like I said, it was at 240 degrees last week, and that's when the light came on, steady.
Wrench: Ground?
Me: Check. Nope. 240's been the average lately, but the cooler's working and it's at 210. This doesn't make any sense.
Wrench: We're talking about the right-hand red light, correct?
Me: No. The one on the left.
Wrench: (Laughing) You're an idiot. That's what the light means.
Me: Don't make me --
Wrench: Didn't you ever have a Beetle?
Me: No.
Wrench: I put those wires back the way they were SUPPOSED to be in November! Generator on the left, oil pressure on the right. "GO." Generator, Oil. I thought I told you that!
Me: Alzheimer's, I guess, or you never said anything.
Wrench: Get yourself a 13mm socket and a ratchet. Tighten the ground on your starter, and see if the GENERATOR light, on the LEFT, goes out. You need to borrow my label-maker?

(Uh ... mystery solved. Stop laughing. I can hear you all from here.)

Well even if you did manage to slaughtered you dignity you still have the Cory humor and we all like ya :)
Hell we all screw up.... This magician once unscrewed a faulty oil pressure switch from a Miata head replacing it with a new one since. I couldn't see where it went, I had to feel around and screw it blindly back into the head port. I managed to accidentally screwed it into a boss on the head and not.... the actual place where I had removed to bad one from. Vrrroooom ...friggin in just seconds, four quarts of Valvoline's finest refined crude everywhere in the shop! in the shop!

Cory, you say you never had a VW so I guess you wouldn't have known that the generator/alternator light was yellow and the oil pressure light was red. Makes troubleshooting easier and faster.

Geez, it's way weird that the light always went out when I saw you put the oil in!? It was the Alt. all along! DOH! You have an oil temp gauge, maybe a pressure gauge is in order.

Alan, Nolan; I knew you guys'd get a kick out of the story. I'll never forget "GO" now, for as long as I live. Generator, Oil pressure. ... Easy as taking fish from a shark. Got it.
Bill, that's exactly what I thought. Who the hell knows?
After a while, I'm going to start calling "bugs" I can't figure out "features" instead.
At least this one had a happy ending.