Just Discovered the Calendar On Our Site

Now that's slick!

I FEEL LIKE RODNEY DANGERFIELD

I GET NO RESPECT

 

NOW THERE'S A FOCKING SUPRISE

 

I propose we have a Appreciate Gerddddd Day. Lets make it February 30th.

 

OH LORD

<dl><dt class="quote">A girl phoned me the other day and said "Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">I told my psychiatrist that everyone hates me. He said I was being ridiculous - everyone hasn't met me yet.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">I went to a fight the other night, and a hockey game broke out.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield </dd><dt class="quote">Life is just a bowl of pits.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield </dd><dt class="quote">My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">My wife is always trying to get rid of me. The other day she told me to put the garbage out. I said to her I already did. She told me to go and keep an eye on it.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd><dt class="quote">When I was born the doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, Look ... twins!</dt><dd class="author">Rodney Dangerfield</dd></dl>

A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant when this absolutely stunning young woman comes over to their table, gives the husband a big open mouthed kiss, then says she'll see him later and walks away.
The wife glares at her husband and says, "Who was that?"
"Oh,"replies the husband, "she's my mistress."
"Well, that's the last straw," says the wife. "I've had enough, I want a divorce!"

"I can understand that," replies her husband, "but remember, if we get a divorce
it will mean no more shopping trips to Paris, no more wintering in Barbados, no more summers in Tuscany, no more Springtime jaunts to the French Riviera with your jet-set friends, no more Jaguar in the garage, no more shopping at Tiffany's, no more country club membership and no more yacht club.
But the decision is all yours, my dear."

Just then, a mutual friend enters the restaurant with a gorgeous babe on his arm.
"Who's that woman with Tom?" asks the wife.
"That's his mistress," says her husband.
"Ours is much prettier," she replies